DO NOT READ IT

Well....i normally wouldnt comment on movies and stuff because i ain't really a critic or a review...neither do i wanna influence how others think of that movie...i mean...what if i said its super nice and they hate it..or what if i said it sucks and they love it...then what am i gonna do?

Ok fine i ain't worried about influencing others i am worried about not being able to influence form a cult of believers who would believe in everything i say and love and hate every movies i recommend or diss.

Oh well its all about pride and ego...a man can't lose them..yet he will not succeed if he have too much of it...its like women...you can't leave without them...and too many of them will kill you..mentally and physically.

well well now its about i am legend....surprisingly i kinda liked it...i mean..it ain't not zombie flick...no seriously...the "undead" in this movies are more of extra...i mean...unlike other zombie movies with lots of gore and actions from the undead eating and chewing on humans like us blah blah blah....this movie ain't really like that.....its more about the human mind and how he survive being alone for a long long time.

very very different from 28 weeks or days later...

People see them as the same kinda movie thus not wanting to watch it...i mean they are thinking why watch another zombie movie when they are all about the same thing....virus..undead...humans...killing...surving...cure...blah blah blah...seen one seen it all..

Well this really ain't like one of those....seriously...ain't no gore..which is ironic cause..just has i thought gore would disgust people...these days people are infact disgust by the movie for not having enough gore....

Maybe AL GORE did leave a legacy by constantly promoting save the earth campaign. ok sorry thats not funny....seriuosly...trying hard to sqeeuze something out of my puny little head right nope....

DAMN it ...this post end up being a review of the god damn nonbloody movie!!....its not a review...if you haven't watch it...you can still read this post...but...its really nothing interesting...

The legend of anaconda!

English teacher REVIEWING post...run...!!!!!

I am so sorry my post are full or grammar errors and its really difficult to read with all these nonsensical errors and probably spelling errors. Oh and i am so god damn sorry about my ignorance in singapore's history...and not getting my facts right...i have no idea that Raffles didn't came to singapore to refill theri supplies...gosh...what a stupid mistake...

WAit...IF raffles really did want to refill supplies in singapore then i would not be writing a story i would be just replicating history wouldn't I? If i really did follow history exactly...then there wouldn't be any point of me writing this god damn full of grammar vittun story would i?

Actually if this post isn't good enuogh for you...please save yourself and your eyes and probably your so god damn almighty life and don't read it...the last thing i want is for my post to ruin someone's fantastic life with my broken english and poor grasp of the english language. Pardon me for all this crap..

Well yes i dodn't take criticism well..and thats me and thats who i am....you can say I ain't no gentlemen...well If you read my post I don't think i gave anyone the idea of me wanting to be a god damn gentlemen...

Who the hell say one should forget and forgive someone and be the almighty one? Screw that guy who cam out with that statement...one should always bear grudges...one should always live to see their enemies suffer and laugh at them...this is life...stepping on your enemies and look at them from the top laughing and smearing shame all over their face.

The person who said one should always forgive and forget is the one who is screwing up your life...and what you waiting for? bear all the grudges you have...its the only way...you will feel happy...no one will feel happy seeing your enemy leading a better life than you...no way....you will only be truely happy if you see your enemy being at his/her lowest and suffering...thats the way to true happinest..

SO if you don't like what you read...then at the top right of your browser i believe there is a cross...click on it and you will be free from crap...

Thank you for all your support and i welcome criticism.

Fukin No Shadow Dick

Another movie idea thought off by MR Ando Tan a R(a) version of the movie huang fei hong. Titled Huang Fei Hong in "No Shadow Dick"

Plot...not thought of yet...probably something to do with haung fei hong and his lover 13th aunt. Might be a short story on the two of them bed time activity. well once the plot is confirm it will be announce.

Lets come out with a rough guide on how the trailer should go...huang retire to his bedroom after a long day of treating patients and bo chi ling. As he was too tired he went to the wrong room and saw 13th in the mids of changing and masturbating...(nice!!) well that sight itself got him horny and his third leg shoots up showing a protruding front.

Scared by the infamous Fukin(fushan) no shadow dick 13th immediatelty spread her legs...(no wait that didn't sound right...but who cares the audience like stuff like this.) Lure by the forbidden 13th aunt inbetween... haung shouts Fukin Wu Ying Niao and fly towards the 13th aunt with his dick swaying from side to side like the infamous fukin no shadow kick, just that its more sexual and apparently more deadly.

Well as its a trailer it will end here...good day people...hope you like my trailer.

Singapore History: Part 1 of the conspiracy theory

There is something i can't figure out after watching the movie national treasure: book of secrets. How the hell did they manage to clear thomas gates name? i mean how by finding the treasure helps in proving gates isn't one of the co-conspirator?

I mean the name of thomas gates is on the missing page...by finding the treasure only proves that the map do exist but it doesnt mean that thomas gates isn't the one of planned and mastermind the assassination of the president...don't get me wrong i ain't saying that i insisting that thomas gates IS the mastermind...but i mean i just don't get it...how does finding the treasure proves he is innocent?

Oh well..its a cool movie but not as cool as the first one..i mean...in the first movie the clues that link everything together is really cool...this one is kinda...erm..cool but not as cool...nevermind...i am lost somewhere...not sure what i am saying...ultimately not as cool.

This ain't a review on the movie...i am just bored and curious...

Anyway after the movie i was thinking maybe singapore has a treasure waiting to be found too...think about it...why did Raffles picked singapore instead of some other place...maybe there is something here that other places doesn't have...is it really because of the location? i mean..thats what every explorer says when they found a new island...its all because of the location...or there is something more than that?

What if when raffles found singapore he thought nothing about it except the entire crew wanted a break and refill their supplies..and as they venture in to the jungle...they found a tribe or kingdom.

In the begining they are welcome by the people from the kingdom as they have never seen westerners before. They were treated with respect and showered with lots and lots of food. Everything were going fine till Raffles crew started to realise this people here have lots of treasure like gold and precious stone. Well greed got to the better of them...and they plan to rid the entire tribe so they can get their hands on these treasure.

Upon knowing this conspiracy Raffles tried to stop them and the only way to convince them was to trick them into not killing the tribe as there might be a greater treasure within the island. But neither did Raffles know was that the island did really have a greater treasure. Its so secret that only the tribal leader knows about it and its buried deep into the jungle at a secret locations. No one else knows about it as the location is only pass down from generations to generations by the tribal leader to the next.( No one except me)

After manage to convince the crew..raffles then had to convince Britain that Singapore was the perfect location for trading and requested to stay put and develope singapore.

Well yes all this would probably take years and the crew at stupid enough to wait that long for the immigrants to set it... But Raffles was smart and the told his crew that..there is no way the tribal leader will reveal the location and he will rather die then to do that..so Raffles came out with a plan saying that by clearing the jungle they might be able to find the treasure themselves...and they only way the tribe will allow them to do that would be to pretend to help build the infrastructure and indirectly improve the life of the tribe.

However the tribe was skeptical about stay here for a long period of time with the building of infrastructure and stuff but after Raffles assure them that the greater treasure is worth the wait..the crew decides to stay and help. But with limited amount of help Raffles then request that they needed more people and immigrants was necessary in helping to clear the forest and building infrastructure but assuring them that the treasures will not be distributed with the new people and only among themselves...thus the crew agrees and this is the begining of immigrants coming into singapore to trade and work. However without any resources available in singapore, Raffles then thought of turning singapore into a port thus resources from world wide would pass through this island and this allows them to carry on with their work.

But what the crew didn't know is that with the influx of traders and immigrant it made it nearly impossible to even leave the island with the treasure without being notice. The crew immediately know they were being tricked and wanted to get rid of Raffles, to there dismay by now singapore has law and order and his crew members are being captured and send to prison..

Well i am getting tired of writing this story its getting no where. Anyway he found the treasure but decided to hide it so that the British empire will not find it and destroy the entire city of singapore. He left hint and clues around like the coats of arm which is being used in Raffles Institution and Raffles Junior College.

Clues are left all around like there are certain types of plants are named after him and all these are part of his plan..so on and so forth...oh well No matter how much i hope its true..it will never be true and this is a boring story...i am out of here.

Men drive and lady lay

Goodness gracious me! for god sake pls pls pls don't attempt to drive if you can't drive for nuts!( for ladies if you can drive for nuts please feel free to drive towards mine)

I seriously think this people...(i will not call them drivers cause they ain't fit to be called that..well on second thought they almost drive me crazy...so yah drivers they are) need to either start taking public transport or start walking..

No way am i letting this anger of mine subside and do nothing about it...well actually i am doing nothing about it besides typing it out...anyway...To those drivers to tap on the freaking brakes when a mosquito flew pass your windscreen god damn it..if you manage to even kill a freaking mosquito and do mankind some good then just bloody kill it....stop tapping on your bloody brake every now and then something flew pass.

If its green light pls step on your bloody accelerator...i mean..if its too small then get a bigger one...Look i don't mean to be impatient here but spare some thought for those cars waiting behind the god damn bloody long queue...due to your reluctant of depressing the tiny bitsy accelerator you will waste a couple of minutes and that couple of minutes will then snow ball into a couple more minutes due to the delayed reaction time of every other car behind you and the poor chap at the last of the line have to wait a couple more traffic lights...

If you happen to come out with excuses like oh i was doing something else and wasn't pay attention...then for muther vittun sake pay attention to the lights! stop wanking while driving...or putting on make-up...remember comestic doesn't cure ugly...infact excessive of it might enhance you already satan blessed face..(sorry ladies i swear i don't mean to be sexist but there are just too many lousy LADY drivers out there pardon me)

Enough of delayed reaction..now comes the people who can't change lanes or are afraid to change lanes...or think its dangerous to change lane...well advise...either you practice or you just stick to your own lane and drive around singapore without even reaching your destination.

And please for drivers who notice others changing into your lane if its will not vittun kill you slightly hit on the brakes, slow down and let them in!!!!!! if it will not break your muther vittun flimsy legs of yours then kindly slow down...thank you muther phuckers.

NEXT....for those drivers whose love for the mother earth is so strong that they are willing to save every bit of battery power from the evil signals....and try to win a nobel prize on saving mother earth...can got them it go crash and die pls...because you are sucking up on mother earth resources yourself...

ITs ok not to signal at times...but when it might happen to affect others then stop saving the earth and start signalling...

EXAMPLE: If you are turning right and the driver opposite you wants to turn right too...it will be nice to signal RIGHT and let the other drivers opposite you know that hey i am turn not going straight so you don't have to wait for me...instead of not signalling and hoping the other driver happen to be a psychic.

To conclude if you do not know if you need to signal then SIGNAL. i seriously cant mention this enough but i have nothing more to say about it and worst of all my anger seems to have subside tremendously..damn

OK lastly...if you are a female...stop driving..

P.S I would like to credit one of my best friend Ben Lee for this post except the sexist part. He had a cleaner version on his blog do read it...if anyone else is reading this blog besides me and ben

complains

Damn it i seriously misses the glorious state of california...all the homeless people, all the friendly and pretty ABCs and all the freaking cheap clothes...

You will never believe how damn cheap the stuff were...10 bucks for AX tees...come on! its freaking cheap...but wonder why didnt i buy a single stuff from AX..oh yah i thought it was a waste of money and thought it was still expensive till i realise today that actually normal clothes in singapore were pretty expensive like GAP...i mean...GAP cost like a whopping 50 over dollars...gosh...

I swear i didn't know clothes in singapore are so freaking expensive...i mean...its not even produce locally for god sake...its produce by the glorious cheap nation called CHINA....where labour are so dirt cheap that probably the cows are worth more.

DAMN who would have thought stuff over here are really expensive...aiyah...we need a stronger currency but its not really possible too... And we are paid so little compared to the americans...actually i am in no position to complain about that..i don't wanna be sue....no politics...sorry..

One thing i would like to complain about would be the quality of our advertisement...i never thought that advertisement could be a form of entertainment till i enter the land of creativity...damn! Local advertisement...is a total failure man...i mean...seriously if you can't produce or come out with good stuff just follow the chinese copy and claim its yours...DO NOT show us crap...and just think we might just accept the crap...come on!! we are obedient but not dumb! okie maybe we are...but thats not the point..

its probably enough of complaining for now...i realise this post is nothing close to being interesting....crap..